Friday, November 21, 2008

Imitation Mondays; Less tasty than imitation vanilla

Morning Chickens!

I thought I posted yesterday, but I guess I didn't. I was going to post this;

Dear Internet,

When I look at my nose cross eyed, it looks really hairy. Would you please look at your nose and tell me if it's hairy too, because if not, I'm going to start freaking out.

Love,

A. Nonnie Mouse.

But today I have bigger problems. I think my jaw is out of alignment. Which, I didn't think you could do but Google says that you can and my stupid husband says is a result of talking too much. I think I can safely say that's not the cause as *I* rarely utter a peep. Right? Hush, you.

What Google DOESN'T tell me is what to do about it. Because as much as I would really super love to go and get the hook up with some tasty medical intervention, the fact of the matter is I have actual work to do today. I know, I know, but one day I week I figure I should do at least an hour or so worth of work. You know, because someone has to do it and as usual, I'm the only one in the office. Which kind of blows, but then again right now, I'm eating yogurt and blogging, so it's not like I can complain. Mostly because there is no one here to complain to.

I even flipped the phone to nights so that I wouldn't have to talk, but of course everyone that calls some how manages to figure out my extension and it's ringing to me anyway. And if there is one thing I can not stand, and who am I kidding, there are like nine million things that make me beyond fucking nuts, but if I had to pick one right now, I'd say that I HATE the sound of a ringing phone. I also hate the sound of dripping water, incessant sporadic ticking, people chewing, fingernail tapping, dogs licking themselves, children having tantrums while their parents ignore them, whining children, Fran Drescher, and nose blowing.

Did I mention that I'm cranky as a result of said painful jaw misalignment? Hm. Well, I'm sure you'll figure it out yourself. You're clever like that.

21 little kittens say Meow:

kristin said...

It's not too early for a drink.

and it's Friday.

Jane! said...

Nope, no fur on my nose.

Snot sniffing is what really chaps me. Blow your dam nose already.

Miss Thystle said...

Right you are, Jane, I forgot that one too. I just checked my nose again and it's not furry anymore. Maybe it's because I was wearing sunglasses last time? Maybe I've shed my nose fur. It's a mystery.

33 questions said...

No, my nose is not hairy, but my rack looks twice as wide. God knows, I prayed hard enough for them. I deserve twice as wide for my sheer tenacity.

Sheree

Bj in Dallas said...

I am with Jane, that constant sniff is what pushed me over the edge toward a friggin divorce! (well not just that...) At the dinner table, over the lovely meal I had just made, he would start the sniffing, and I would get up and get a box of Kleenex and place it on the table.
Herein lies the difference:
He blew his nose at the table
The next guy won't be a table nose blower.
The end

Miss Thystle said...

AMEN to that sister. It's the little things, right? Like leaving his damn socks BESIDE the hamper but never in it. GGGRRRR.

Lorrie Veasey said...

Thystle: have you had your wisdom teeth out yet? I know when mine grew in it felt like I'd been in a bar fight and had taken a hard right to the chin. Course, that was also true, but those suckers were crowning at the same time.

Miss Thystle said...

I'm pretty sure it's not Wisdom teeth, since my bite is misaligned. it's freaky. I look demented. YOu know, more than usual.=, I mean.

Anonymous said...

Thystle, are you a teeth grinder or clencher? I am, but only when I sleep. It's painful as all hell. Now I wear this oh-so-attractive mouth guard that cost me like a squillion dollars from the dentist. But the pain is gone.

Or just take alot of Robotussin & sleep thru the pain. But be careful, I hear it can be addictive.

Miss Thystle said...

yeah, I'm a clencher. I blame the stress my husband causes for it. But I already have one of those teeth clenchy guardy wotsits. In fact, wearing it last night was the only time my jaw hasn't hurt since Wednesday.

Miss Thystle said...

But I'm drinking the Robo anyway.

Just to be safe.

Robin said...

Okay Okay...nobody else will say it so I will...
could the jaw problem be from giving too many blow jobs????

I'm just sayin'

Anonymous said...

Yup, keep up the Robo.

Even with said guard, apparently I clench so hard that I have ground away (yes, ground away) a porcelain filling that is only 2 years old.

My dentist, who I love, told me if I continue on this path (which I'm sure I will) my teeth will be flat like cows teeth.

Should I have been offended?

Miss Thystle said...

LOL @ Nadine. THAT is why I love you.

To Sheila - nah, I'll be right there with you. I'm thinking we'll be able to afford veneers though before too long.

33 questions said...

Maybe not so much about the comment, but for sure if he asks you for a blow job.

Anonymous said...

Nadine, you might be on to something...

Anonymous said...

Nadine, you might be on to something...

kristin said...

You know, for a person who STILL has a kidney infection, it doesn't take much, but you guys have me almost peeing in my pants.

Again.

Bj in Dallas said...

I heard cow teeth were in for 2009

So T, you had the teeth thing in plus the sleep apnea machine hooked up and you were high on Robotussin...

bet you didn't get any

kristin said...

Bwahahahahaha! I love BJ.

t i m said...

poor technique = jaw misalignment... :)