Monday, August 24, 2009

Rawr, Baby.

Dear BJ,

I know that you objected to the last boyfriend I found you. Though I don't know why, as he was clearly a Klassy specimen of man flesh, but WHATEVER. I guess some people are just picky.



So, because I LUVS you like a fat kid loves cake...actually let's make that "like I love cake" I have been hard at work finding you a NEW boyfriend. Someone with real, animalistic sex appeal. The sort of man that makes you go all She Wolf up in here.





I KNOW, right? You're totally welcome.

Luvurleopardprintguts,
Kiki

PS. Don't forget I can perform weddings. Real, legal weddings.

PPS. As long as there's cake.

PPPS. I like chocolate cake, just FYI

PPPPS. It didn't say, but I'm pretty sure his name is Dwayne.

10 little kittens say Meow:

sheila said...

Gotta luv the mullet. It's business in the front and par-tay in the back.

BJ, you are so lucky to have a friend like Thystle.

OHN said...

I'm sorry. I have no words.

Bj in Dallas said...

Well, I do.

First of all, something is terribly wrong with his left arm.
Was it from too much usage?? Or was he flinging his stash out of the window of the Monster truck when getting pulled over by the popo and injured himself?

Either way, that is my first concern.

Secondly, I have a huge problem with the background he has chosen at Olin Mills. That tie-dye shit is so 80's.

And then, my sisters third husbands twin brothers best friend is named Dwayne, and I just can't go there.

Other than that, he's AWESOME.

GO EAT SOME CAKE JUST CAUSE I SAID YOU COULD.

oh, and thanks for thinking of me.

Lin said...

Wow...that's something.

Looks like there should be a girl or guy (I dont judge) hanging onto his right arm & was cropped out, lol.

Kr√ęg said...

That guy drives an IROC-Z. Trust.

Racie Lover said...

No one mentioned his animal-print thong. I guess that's because everyone was so busy admiring his mullet and his manly physique.

I am going to print the photo and show it to Paco tonight. Stay tuned for the makeover...

Bj in Dallas said...

really? an IROC-Z? do you think it has T-Tops?

hmmmmmmm.....

Bj in Dallas said...

OH! I get the 'arm' now.....thats his escort arm! Like 'care to come away with me, in my IROC-Z?'

Lorrie Veasey said...

I'm gonna guess he has a waterbed with black satin sheets and listens to a lot of Van Halen.

Not that, erm,. I ever dated his brother or anything.

Anonymous said...

You guys have it so wrong. The arm thing is all about the Swatch on his wrist.