Tuesday, November 11, 2008

A Lesson Learned

I think we all remember that time I wore this, but at least that was in the comfort of my own front yard. It's not like I go out in public like that, right?

Except that last night...well, last night, I was half way through assembling my new bed frame when I discovered that I was missing one of the screw-thingies that holds the side rail to the head board. And, of course, it was not the sort of screw one has laying around the house, thus necessitating a trip to man heaven...I mean, Home Depot.

Now, I don't know about you girls, but I'm not a big fan of the HD. For one thing, every single damn time I go there, it costs me $100 to be let back out. At the least. Not to mention that I leave there with grandiose plans of slate floors and paint 'treatment' walls with gorgeous fixtures and remote control fans despite knowing full well that the LAST project started in my home was five years ago and remains "in progress". In fact, I'm more likely to be struck by lightening while holding a winning lottery ticket and getting a congratulatory kiss from Teddy Bruschi than I am to see a home improvement project actually improve my home.

Nonetheless, I needed that damn screw and quickly because Monday Night Football was about to start and traffic around the stadium (where HD inconveniently resides) is dreadful. So, unthinking, I grab my gorgeous, classy purse, slip on some $1 flip flops and dash out the door.

Dressed like this


No, you're not seeing things. I'm wearing a "burn out" pink tee shirt with a bright blue bra under it. In public.

And you know what? I'm going to do it again, because those HD guys? NEVER more attentive!

11 little kittens say Meow:

Jane! said...

I don't think it would matter what color of bra you put those things in... the Manheaven Associates are going to pay ATTENTION!
Didja get your screw?
Hahaha!

penelope said...

Damn, I have that same shirt, and never knew where to wear it, because it's so see-through. Now I know!

OHN said...

When you go out dressed like that, you are likely to come home with more than one screw ;)

Nadine Hightower said...

And that's how I get so much help in those places!!! And cleavage!!!

Lorrie Veasey said...

My Gawd Thystle-you need a second blog called www.checkthisrackout.com because I have NEVER met a blogger who liked to photograph her own shirt front more: and how do you DO that anyway because it never looks like your arm is outstretched....

I'm voting for you for best boobalicious blogger at the bloggers choice awards.

Miss Thystle said...

LOL. DO IT. Can I vote for myself?

Megan said...

Exactly! What I want to know is how many times did you have to repeat yourself to the associates who couldn't concentrate on your request for all that looking at your boobs? I'm guessing three times, AT LEAST.

Eric said...

I wonder why my pink shirt doesn't help me at the local HD store? Should I be wearing a dark blue codpiece?

Bj in Dallas said...

Oy Vey! HD in traffic, no way, I would have bent or melted a spoon and crafted my own screw. But I do like your strategy. I took the ranchhand to the ER one night, which you usually do in a hurry, and when they took him to the back and I was no longer Nurse Nancy, I looked down at what I was wearing and cracked up-
Blacksweatshirt with no bra, and white shorts with SCREAMING purple underwear. I should have had that purse of yours T....

sheila said...

at my house, we call HD 'church', because that's where everyone is on Sunday.

so, since you wore that fetching ensemble did you have to pay for the screw?!

CK said...

I had to go to HD once on my way to an opening night(had to buy a present!) in a short skirt and heels and practically had to beat the salesguy off with a stick. No, really, all I need is a mag lite, thank you.

That said, I think your rack would win the salesman attention getting contest. :)