Play Ball

My Grandmas’ brain in basically Swiss cheese.

When her nursing home lost power in Seattle’s big storm last week, my uncle went and got her and took her to his house.

The very first thing Gram did was march up to the hallway bathroom (visible from most of the house) and take a big, smelly poo with the door wide open and then walk away leaving it unflushed. My uncle says to her “Mom, we prefer that the bathroom door be closed when people are using the toilet” to which she replied “But why? It stinks in there!” Can’t argue with that I guess.

Oh, but Gram-time gets even better!

The next morning, she walks out of the bathroom stark nekkid and proceeds to wander around the house. My aunt, who would be up for sainthood were she not Buddhist, says “Mom, you’ll catch a cold if you don’t get dressed” to which Gram replies “My underwear is too small. I can’t get dressed with out underwear.” Hmmmm again with the logic.

And for her grand finale….

Saint Auntie finds her in the office surveying an array of chargers for things like cell phones, MP3’s and laptops.

“What are all these pluggy whatsits for?” she asks Saint Auntie.

“Well, we have a lot of fun electronics and toys and everything needs to be charged up, and everything has a different plug, so we keep them all here so they’re organized”. Saint Auntie patiently explains.

Gram thinks for a moment and says

“Which ones are for the sex toys?”

Makes me wish we were going home for Christmas, the dinner conversation is bound to be scintillating!